Enoughness without the Roughness

I stole this title from the brilliant and beautiful Tracey Selingo's "About Me" page. I checked it out because of her post today about authenticity. (I told you she was brilliant!) She mentioned "enoughness without the roughness" and that was a phrase I could relate to.

I've written about my perceptions of not enoughness before. I shared about the little sign I started with, which still hangs in my bathroom, that reminded me daily that I truly was enough. Period. (I even created signs to download on that post, so if anyone else is feeling like they're not enough, you, too, can have a reminder! Grab one.....or ten!)

But the reason why Tracey's phrase resonated with me so deeply is that, even though I know I'm enough, some days, it's still a battle. My fears and insecurities creep in, and that not enoughness rears its ugly head. 

Case in point.....my first novel will be available for sale in June (wooohoooooooooo!). I'm excited about it; this is a topic I truly believe in, and a practice I used in my classroom. This will tell you all about how Class Letters came to be. 

But I have to admit, the closer I get to June, the more my not enoughness kicks in. The "what if" questions pry their way into my consciousness.....what if no one reads it? What if they read it and hate it? What if "they" think I'm a shitty writer? Did I edit enough?  Did I write enough? Did I make the story interesting enough?  Sheesh! 

But behind all these "what if''s" and "did I's" (because they are just a manifestation of my insides) is the root question: Am I Enough?

Fuck yeah, I am.

Because enoughness isn't about book sales or writing ability or the number on the scale or the zeros in your bank account. I am enough, because I'm a precious child of God. I was created to be uniquely me.....to do the things that only I can do, to say the things only I can say, and to be the person only I can be. 

So, during this time of waiting for book sales to begin (and doing more marketing), I will remind myself that my words and my story are enough, and especially, that I am enough. No internal arguments, rough or otherwise. So be it and so it is.

Have you struggled with not enoughness? Have you found enoughness without roughness?

Have you been there?

P.S. I think this is an example of authentic enoughness. Listen to the words.....own it!